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Writer's pictureTammie Jenks-Caffee

The Ones I Thought I Knew: Living Out a Biblical Worldview in a Conflicted Modern Culture


Into the Darkness

At the conclusion of my last post several weeks ago, I chose to remain a quiet election observer. As a woman who has worn many hats over the years—daughter, student, wife, mom, educator, expat, friend and now grandmother and great grandmother—outcomes matter to me. Many had a personal stake in this one, and it seems my worldview differs from that of the many...This time, however, the ones I thought I knew who had and still hold such bitterness and contempt for anyone not walking in lock step with their worldly ideals leave me baffled.


Their expectation that I blindly walk the same road they have chosen and follow this messy world and those of it into the abyss of nothingness not only breaks my heart for them but also makes me wonder, “What happened?” At one time the ones I thought I knew traveled the road of truth. They now live the mantra, “Find your truth. Live your truth, and of course, choose only that truth which allows you to live your best life now.” Anything beyond the here and the now seems insignificant. They draw a line in the sand and build ineffaceable walls. They choose self above all else and make the desires of their selfish hearts the ultimate authority in their decision making.


The ones I thought I knew normalize sin and say, “You are wrong. You are the selfish one. You are confused about truth and about the things God desires for our modern culture.” They are right about one thing...I am selfish about God and the truth of His Word. Every attempt the ones I thought I knew and others make to change my mind about that will not be successful. The roads I have traveled and my personal choices assure me life works best not only for me but also for those I care about when I leave everything in God’s hands.

I look around and see God has simply gone out of style for some. The voices of those choosing to be of the world shame only themselves. If anything, the voices of the ones I thought I knew have given me more courage to be the unflinching daughter of God and the woman He created me to be. I will continue in my endeavor to seek His truth and to keep His Word. God is my ultimate authority in all things. “For thus says the LORD, Who created the heavens, Who is God, Who formed the earth and made it, Who has established it, Who did not create it in vain, Who formed it to be inhabited: “I am the LORD, and there is no other” (Isaiah 45:18, ESV).


God’s Word gives each one of us discerning wisdom. The warnings found there are more than mere cautionary tales. They are promises.


Seek the Lord while he may be found;    

call upon him while he is near;

let the wicked forsake his way,    

and the unrighteous man his thoughts;

let him return to the Lord,

that he may have compassion on him, 

and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.”

(Isaiah 55:6-7, emphasis mine).


As for the ones I thought I knew, I have this, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). I embrace the truth of God’s Word and trust in every biblical promise found within its pages. The ones I thought I knew did at one time too. They trusted in God and His plans for their lives, and they believed in the truth of His Word. We did not always get it right. We failed miserably at times and still do. I wish sin did not live in me, but it does. Where God and my salvation are concerned, I take nothing for granted. I do not always understand what God is doing in my life and the lives of those I care about most, but I wake daily with the prayer that today might be the day we finally get everything right. Some days are better than others. Fortunately, for us God remains. He does not let go, and I hold onto Him and His promises until the day of Christ Jesus.


It is a BIG thing to me that God wants none of us—you, me, and the ones I thought I knew—to perish. For God so loved [us] that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn [us], but to save [us] through him.” Those words from John 3:16-17 always get me, and when I read further, I am aware the Holy Spirit pushes this gal to write even on those days when I would rather be a silent observer. “Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God” (John 3:18-21, emphasis mine).


Knowing this, I wonder as I write. Is this merely confusion caused by the noise and the chaos of the world and those of it or is there something deeper and darker residing within the hearts, the minds, and the souls of the ones I thought I knew? I would like to believe that is not the case, but they stand firm in their belief that I am confused, confident in what they say is God’s truth for their lives.


This world is a treacherous place. We need to pray, without ceasing, for one another. “In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication”(Ephesians 6:16-18). Personal experience tells me those flaming darts often hit their mark. The fight is real. Not one of us is immune from the attacks of the evil one.


I struggle when I see the ones I thought I knew and others whom I do not intent on taking up the causes and crusades of the evil one and calling it the will of God. When everything in me struggles to understand, God’s unchanging Word answers me and I am comforted “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also. And you know the way to where I am going.” Thomas said to him, “Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you had known me, you would have known my Father also. From now on you do know him and have seen him” (John 14:1-7, emphasis mine). What a promise for those who walk in truth!


I know the One who calls to us, the One who permeates the noise, the chaos, and the confusion of the world, and I know the one who takes the hand of anyone choosing to follow the path into darkness and destruction rather than the path of light, of absolute truth, and of salvation. Everything in me fights to believe the ones I thought I knew would willfully choose to be enemies of the cross of Christ, for I know discerning minds understand the things of which they speak, the principles they support, and the agendas they follow are not biblical, and therefore, not truthful. Could it be “They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart.” (Ephesians 4:18)? I do not want that to be their truth, but what else could it be? A hardened heart, lack of discernment or merely the need to be right? Whatever it is my prayers become more fervent with each passing day for the ones I thought I knew. 


C. S. Lewis said it well when he wrote, “The hall is a place to wait in, a place from which to try the various doors, not a place to live in. For that purpose, the worst of the rooms (whichever that may be) is, I think, preferable. It is true that some people may find they have to wait in the hall for a considerable time, while others feel certain almost at once which door they must knock at. I do not know why there is this difference, but I am sure God keeps no one waiting unless He sees that it is good for him to wait. When you do get into your room you will find that the long wait has done you some kind of good which you would not have had otherwise. But you must regard it as waiting, not as camping. You must keep on praying for light; and, of course, even in the hall, you must begin trying to obey the rules which are common to the whole house. And above all you must be asking which door is the true one; not which pleases you best by its paint and paneling. In plain language, the question should never be: 'Do I like that kind of service?' but 'Are these doctrines true: is holiness here? Does my conscience move me towards this? Is my reluctance to knock at this door due to my pride, or my mere taste, or my personal dislike of this particular door-keeper? 'When you have reached your own room, be kind to those who have chosen different doors and to those who are still in the hall. If they are wrong, they need your prayers all the more; and if they are your enemies, then you are under orders to pray for them. That is one of the rules common to the whole house.”


We do not all arrive at the same time, and I pray the ones I thought I knew and others choose not to stand too long in the hall, that they, instead, open the door leading to Jesus...the way, the truth, and the life.


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